Step 1: Win the lottery so you can have enough money to pay a fancy baking person for the elaborate treats featured in this image. Because you definitely won’t have the energy to make them during DEVOLSON.
If you’re just tuning in, there’s an acronym I coined for the period of time every fall when I cry about 10 times more regularly than normal.
DEVOLSON, the happy, shiny newness of Back-to-School has faded. Boundaries are
being tested. The work is getting tougher. The workday is getting longer while
the hours of sunlight are getting shorter. And there is no break in sight.
Dark, Evil Vortex of Late September, October, and November.
artists know that the best way to deal with an opposing force is to move your body in a way that embraces the force instead of resists it. In
this post, I’m taking the same approach to DEVOLSON. When we try to pretend
like DEVOLSON isn’t happening or try to work against it, we merely increase the
tension until we reach a point where we become frustrated and feel hopeless.
Recognizing DEVOLSON and laughing about it with our teaching buddies? Suddenly this
long, break-less period of doom is tackle-able.
you to host a DEVOLSON party for you and your coworkers. Here is everything
invitations make anything more fun, but let’s be real: it’s DEVOLSON and you’re
tired and have no money. Luckily, the good folks over at Paperless Post* have
your back. Super cute, super easy online invitations. And many of them are
free! Here’s one I whipped up real quick on their website:
invitations, don’t worry. You can just save one of the images below and slap it on an email.
needs to know that feelings are okay. Banners with customizable alphabet
letters are everywhere these days. I think I want mine to read, “Everything Is
Terrible,” Simple, true, to-the-point. Other options:
that time. Pasta, an ice cream sundae bar, mashed potato stations, this is
where your mind needs to be when planning food for a DEVOLSON party. Here are
some recipes I found for treats that are easy and emotionally soothing:
- Massage/spa gift certificate
- Netflix subscription
- Candle, miniature Zen garden, bath products, or
other relaxation-related item
- One of these awesome head pillows for sleeping
at your desk during your conference period
arrangements for lots and lots of wine. If you’re on campus, stick to grape
juice and pretend in your head that it has real-wine powers, or try
non-alcoholic versions of these not-really-signature-but-with-fun-names
teacher behaviors as you can. Use those statements to create Bingo cards. I
almost typed out the rules for Bingo, but then I remembered we’re all
teachers! Here are some sample
statements to get you started:
rocking this summer.
mismatched clothing (shoes, socks, etc.)
matching game. First one with all correct wins! (This game might be better if
you’ve got a younger crowd, though seasoned vets could totally hold their own!)
party, because it’s time for me to go to bed. (It’s 8:32).